The Last Chapter
by Fivercon
Summary: Feeling unsettled and easily irritated, the once composed Kurama searches for the reason to his strange behavior. Has Youko reawakened a yearning for his past life? Or is it something that's long been dormant inside his heart? KB. Kurama's POV. [COMPLETE]
1. Unusual Restlessness

Author's Note: So, here it is at last. The first chapter to this three-shot is FINALLY up and running. This whole four year KB project should be finished pretty soon. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho. All characters are owned by the talented Yoshihiro Togashi.

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Unusual Restlessness 

For the pass couple of months, my schoolwork had been gaining on me. For whatever reason, I had no idea why. This was pretty strange, considering that I usually had answers to everything. The day was as normal as the life of Shuichi Minamino could ever be. After the bell had signaled the dismissal, I swiftly gathered my things to leave before I got unwelcomed greetings from my peers. I knew I had many admirers at my school but some days, their attention would turn into a cumbersome matter. This was one of those times. Being the first one out of the door, I promptly made my way out of the hall and weaved through the oncoming students in search of my study area: the library. It soon came into view and in under a minute's time, I was situated at a desk and was ready to get some time alone. The rest of the day left little time for homework so I decided to get the chore out of the way.

While pulling out the materials, a feeling I would dub as boredom settled in my thoughts. Figures, statistics and charts seemed to fester in my mind as mundane distractions from the real world so naturally I couldn't concentrate. The window I sat by was opened so I felt a light breeze blow across my face. It was refreshing and surprisingly, I caught the scent of flowers.

Having the spirit of a fox on my other side, I couldn't resist the lure of nature.

Deciding to neglect my studies, I once again gathered my books and headed toward the forest. Although it paled in comparison with the forest back in Makai, it would have to do. I walked right into the heart of the forest where the dark shades of the trees were the thickest. They were so dense that not a single speck of sunlight managed to pierce the surrounding darkness. This barrier gave me comfort for it separated me from the rest of Ningenkai. Throughout the years, I had come to terms with my life as Shuichi Minamino but I sometimes couldn't help feeling trapped. Limits and boundaries were everywhere and the call of the wild constantly haunted my senses. Unfortunately, an insignificant patch of forest in the middle of the city was the closest I could get to quench my desire.

I jumped up onto a sturdy branch of an oak tree so I could be further hidden from the world. This agitation was so unusual that I didn't know what to categorize it under. Letting out a quiet sigh, I settled back into the trunk of the tree. Another breeze was in the air and I soon caught the aroma of roses. With the rose being particularly special to me, my interest grew and I proceeded to search for the fragrance's origin. I looked down to my left and saw a tiny wild rosebush growing amongst other shrubs.

_That's strange._ _Wild rosebushes are pretty rare around forests like these._

From my position, I could see them perfectly. After I examined the roses, I figured that they were all right. Probably better than average That might have sounded a little audacious but I know a rose's true quality because of my experience with plants. I couldn't help it if I knew my own roses were flawless. It was the truth and there was really no comparison.

Although they were only of mediocre standards, they made me smile as I reminisced a particularly pleasant wedding ceremony about four months ago…

"Congratulations Koenma." I said. Yusuke, Kuwabara and I were in Koenma's dressing room, as he got ready for his big day.

"Yeah, our little baby is all grown up, no pacifier and all…." Yusuke sniffed. He and Kuwabara burst into laughter as Koenma eyed them warily.

"Give me a break boys, I'm getting married. Today, I'm going to be a man," Koenma declared. "Literally."

"Wohoo! Go Koenma!" Kuwabara shouted as he attempted to strike a manly pose to accompany the declaration. He and Yusuke grinned. I sighed and shook my head, a little embarrassed by theirpredictability. "Aw, Kurama you don't agree with us?" Kuwabara asked while nudging me on the elbow.

"Kurama is too proper for that." Yusuke answeredrather insightfullywhile tugging at his bowtie. "Crap, this freakin' stupid bowtie is choking me! Ugh. Somebody help me! What a piece of shi-!" His efforts only succeeded in making it worse as it was pulled it even tighter and I was afraid he might have ended up strangling himself.

"Yusuke stop. Stop!" I ordered. Yusuke stopped tugging and glared at me as I undid his bowtie.

"Stupid things…" Yusuke grumbled. I had finally managed to untie it and was redoing it into its proper position.

"Urameshi you're such an idiot! Even I was able to tie mine by myself." Kuwabara laughed and he pointed his finger to his own bowtie. I myself had to suppress a laugh, the bowtie was so twisted that it hung vertically instead of the usual horizontal way and was slowly rotating its way back around.

"There." I had finished fixing Yusuke's bowtie and I made my way to Kuwabara's when Koenma announced it was time for him to go.

"Alright boys, wish me luck!" he said. I gave him an encouraging smile while Yusuke and Kuwabara gave big thumbs up. But just when he was out of earshot Yusuke took his chance to say what he truly had in mind.

"And he's gonna need it my friends." He shook his head and folded his arms.

"What do you mean Urameshi?" Kuwabara asked. He had always been a little late on the uptake but this time I also wanted to know what Yusuke meant.

"That Ayame girl is gonna chew him up and spit him out after about a week or two. I mean haven't you guys ever heard of those insane stories about those couples out there? Marriage is scary."

"Urameshi! How could you say that? What, you don't want to get married to Keiko?" Kuwabara asked indignantly. Maybe it was the romantic side of Kuwabara that went on the defensive for the concept of holy matrimony.

"Well, um…." Yusuke stopped running his mouth and just grumbled something about Keiko being totally different. I finished Kuwabara's bowtie and stepped out onto the balcony.

"Yeah, I think I heard Yukina mentioning that Ayame was a controlling woman at times. She says she heard it from Botan." Kuwabara commented.

"Really?" I said, turning back to them. "I've always thought Ayame and Koenma have gotten along quite well."

"Well maybe you should ask Botan. Though knowing her, she's probably forgotten about it." said Yusuke.

I smiled slightly, knowing that Botan had probably done exactly what he'd said. She had always been very easy to be around and she would never keep minor details like those in her mind because they weren't important. At that moment, a blue ogre popped his head in.

"Gentlemen it's almost time!" he announced.

"Are you doing alright in that tuxedo there, George?" I asked as he grimaced and pulled at his collar. "You look as uncomfortable as Yusuke."

"Hey!" Yusuke glared at me again.

"Well all I've got to say is that I hope this ceremony goes by fast." George grunted. He led us out of the door and down into the back room where the procession was supposed to be taking place. There we met Keiko, Yukina and Hinageshi who were all looking lovely in their bridesmaid dresses.

"Yukina! You look as radiant as ever!" Kuwabara said withhis usual signatureexpression of love on his facethat causedYukina to slightly back away. Butshe smiled innocently as always and unknowinling returned a priceless compliment to Kuwabara who was on the verge of losing his coolness. Suddenly, the sound of a slap rang out and at once I knew that it had come from Keiko. It was obvious that Yusuke had done something inappropriate and had gotten a well-deserved punishment.

"Yusuke! Watch what you're doing will you? We're at a wedding!" Keiko fumed.

"Yeah, yeah sure whatever." Sighed Yusuke rubbing his still red cheek. I chuckled quietly to myself thinking how Keiko was the only one who could ever make Yusuke behave.

Soon, footsteps could be heard coming down the other hall. It turned out to be the bride Ayame, and Botan. Ayame looked divine in her white wedding gown. She greeted everyone a little nervously then took her place in the back. That was when I got the chance to really look at my partner who would be accompanying me down the aisle. Botan looked absolutely beautiful. She had worn her hair down with a delicate white flower tied back in the middle. The deep scarlet dress was very attractive on her.

I had been the one to arrange the flowers so naturally the bouquets were specially crafted. For each of the girls, I had arranged a special bouquet centered around a flower that matched their eye color. Of course, I told no one of this since I always had a passion for plants. This was just a special detail that was added to make the bouquets more beautiful, even if I was the only one who would notice and enjoy it.

Ayame's bouquet held a blue iris, Keiko's had a hazel carnation, and Yukina's contained a red lily. Botan's flower was exceptional to me because it had been very difficult cultivate the particular lavender hue that matched her eyes. It was quite a challenge but in the end, I had achieved the perfect color. Since the color was quite rare, I decided to give that tint to a particular special batch of roses. Of these, I had chosen the best one and made it the center for Botan's bouquet.

Finally the music began and it was time for the wedding ceremony to commence. I walked over to Botan who looked rather excited and extended my arm. After she laid her hand on my sleeve we proceeded to walk down the aisle. Surprised to suddenly hear a small gasp, I glanced at Botan to see her delight as she looked at the decorations I had done.

"You did an amazing job Kurama. No, you outdid yourself." She said quietly. I thanked her replied modestly as usual. I had to admit it felt nice walking with Botan. She walked with a certain flow and grace that she usually doesn't get credit for. We parted when the aisle ended and I took my place on the right hand side of the altar.

Koenma stiffly stood at the bottom of the stairs waiting for his bride, his expression was nervous just like Ayame's but I knew it was just from the anticipation. I was glad for him to finally be able to settle down and although I didn't want to admit it; I also had a hidden desire to have a family of my own. Small chance as it was of actually happening, I couldn't suppress the thought. There would be so many obstacles that would arise to even consider the concept so with disappointment mingled with a firm resolution, I quietly tucked the thought away. I figured that once it was in that corner of my mind, it would stay there until it finally faded away.

When the ceremony ended, we partnered up again. Walking down the wedding aisle made me think and feel as though it would be the _only _time I would ever do so.

When we were once again in the back room, I took a last look around the room when I saw Botan. She seemed surprisingly distracted, not at all like she was at the beginning of the wedding.

At the reception hall, the party began almost immediately when Yusuke and Kuwabara got a hold of some champagne. I grinned as I saw Kuwabara offer a huge glass to a flustered Yukina, and wondered where a certain Urameshi team member was at that moment. As if right on cue, I suddenly felt Hiei's presence outside. Since I decided to prevent any possible damage to the party, I went out to greet him. And sure enough, there was a shadow walking briskly away.

"I'm surprised to see you come Hiei." I said as I leaned casually to the wall. Hiei paused without turning around.

"Don't kid yourself. The reason I came here was to look after her. With that big oaf drinking, who knows what could happen." He began walking away again.

"Really? I thought you were here to congratulate Koenma on finally finding his bride." I said innocently enough though I'm sure he caught my sarcasm.

"Hn. Nonsense."

"Actually, I think it is a wonderful thing that they've found each other. Remember, we had a part in creating this relationship." I mused thinking how we had all played a part in sparking the inevitable beginning of the romance between the two

"Kurama, your life in the human world has really softened your heart." Hiei remarked and disappeared.

That made me think. _Was I really that weak to let love dominate my thoughts? This was never even an issue when I was Youko Kurama…_Thoughts of confusion began to conflict as I realized thatI didn't know if I wanted to relinquish all of my feelings to be like the legendary bandit again, or to live a normal life as a human; experiencing and being affected by emotions.

_But you'll never becompletely human._ A voice rose in my head and I knew that it was true. _How could I ever find someone to truly understand my feelings when I didn't even fully comprehend them myself? Most importantly, if I couldn't, how could anyone else? _A good amount of time was spent outside as I pondered my feelings and wrestled with my thoughts until finally, I couldn't think any more. All conclusions I came to were dead ends to both of my conflicting sides.

A little irritated about my "fruitful" battle, I went back to the hall. The music was still going on and everyone was enjoying the party. Well, not everyone to be exact. My eyes caught Botan sitting alone in a corner. She held a glass of champagne in one hand and she rested her chin on the other one. This was rather surprising because usually, Botan would never be depressed for long. It seemed as though whatever was occupying her thoughts earlier had not gone away…

I decided to go cheer her up so I walked over to her table. As I made my way over, she was pulled out of her reverie and greeted me with a smile. I pulled up a chair next to her and asked if she was tired. She answered normally, but I could tell she was still distracted. I didn't want to pursue my curiosity so I continued the conversation in another subject to try and gently ease her out of any troubled daydreams. Subjects roamed and of course it landed on how nice it was that the couple had finally found the person they cared for most. Seeing the Prince and wife arm in arm was rather comforting. Instead of a quick cheery answer that I had expected, there was a pause until Botan finally answered.

"I think everyone should have someone to be with…Life definitely wouldn't be lonely…" Quite taken aback, I looked at her to find that she had fallen back into her own trance before I had come. It was unsettling for me to see Botan act so out of character. She would never be this disheartened let alone allow it drag on for several hours. Whatever was bothering her must have been fairly significant. Usually, she'd never wandered off in mid-sentence while she was in the company of someone.

Suddenly, she snapped out of her thoughts as the awkwardness of the silence built up and quickly looked apologetically at me before looking away. I guessed she realized that she had told me something unintentionally and was embarrassed that I had heard the personal statement. For a moment there was discomforted period in which neither of us could think of what to say. The awkwardness was surely straining on her so I stood up, offered my hand and invited her to a dance. The pink color in her cheeks deepened a little, but she agreed and took my hand. I smiled inwardly thinking that it was rather sweet when Botan acted shy. It was strangely refreshing since she was typically so outgoing.

I led her to the dance floor and we began to move to the music. At first I could feel that Botan was a little tense, but as the music continued, she relaxed in my arms and allowed me lead. I guessed it _was_ awkward that we were dancing together since we had never done anything like this before. As we followed the music, I found it pleasing to be dancing with her. When I noticed that she was looking at Yusuke and Keiko, I followed her gaze to find Yusuke dancing a little stiffly with a hideous frown on his face. Keiko on the other hand, was beaming and was confidently leading the way. I laughed quietly at that amusing look on his face.

"Yes, I see Keiko has forced Yusuke into a situation he cannot refuse." I commented while Yusuke's frown deepened with every turn. I heard Botan laugh and looked back at her. There was the old charming smile back on her face and I was glad that I was able to get her mind off her troubles. When she opened her eyes and looked straight into my own, I became startled at her gaze. A moment later, she looked away and told me she liked the song that was currently playing. The song was Canon in D from Pachebel and I had to admit, the melody of the strings were very relaxing.

"This song is very peaceful." She commented then closed her eyes. I saw that she really enjoyed the music so I let her settle down as I guided her through the dance floor among the multitudes of couples gliding to the melodious chords. When the song ended, we went to the back of the room to make way for other couples. Glad to see Botan with the cheerful expression once again, I strangely found myself feeling relieved that she was content.

As the cool night air blew in from outside the open doors, I realized it was quite late and checked my watch to confirm the time. I bid her farewell and made my way to the door. Though the night was memorable, the festivities did leave me feeling tired and I was glad to go home. Spending it with her made it even more special as I found her company to be natural. Even though she was distracted, she did not fail to make my night pleasant. As I was about to walk down the stairs, I heard her call out to me. Stopping, I turned around to find her hurrying out of the doors.

"Thank you Kurama, you really made tonight special for me." She smiled and looked down at the floor She then leaned up and gave me a soft kiss on my cheek. My heart certainly quickened its pace as she stepped back and said goodnight. I had to admit that what she did was unexpected but wasn't unwelcome, that at least I knew. I decided to give her a rose just to make her night complete or maybe as a thank you present for the kiss. Whichever reason, I did not know exactly why but it felt right. So I swiftly pulled a rose out of my hair. It was the same lavender color I had cultivated for the rose in her bouquet.

I handed it to her and said, "You're welcome Botan, though I could say the same about you." I turned and walked down the stairs. The kiss was still on my mind. That had completely taken me by surprise since I felt like I didn't do anything particularly special for her to have been in such apparently, high spirits. She seemed to have truly enjoyed my company.

Suddenly, I felt a wave of sympathy towards her… Being the Deity of Death was probably not an easy task as she constantly guided countless souls to Reikai. I wondered how she could handle such a grim occupation and still be so cheerful and energetic at the same time. _Aside from the bride and groom,_ _she deserved a good night herself. _I thought. When I reached the bottom of the stairs, I turned around the corner. That was when I saw a dark figure coming my way. For a second I tensed up and was very cautious until I saw it was Yusuke with a bizarre smug look on his face.

"Kurama!" He called as he approached me.

"Hello, Yusuke." I replied. "How come you aren't in the hall?"

"Oh, I needed a break. Dancing five times straight in a row is not a picnic I'll have you know. Whew! That girl can dance!" He stopped and leaned onto the wall near to us shaking out his worn feet.

"So, how was _your_ night Kurama?" He suddenly asked with a brief gleam in his eye. He folded his arms and smirked while standing in his signature stance.

"Fine." I answered slowly. "Why are you looking at me like that?" Yusuke shrugged but still had that teasing air.

"Oh, nothing. I just thought your night was a little more special than _that._" I was still confused and had no idea what he was getting at. _Unless…_ Now it was my turn to cross my arms.

"Yusuke, what are you talking about?" I said more seriously attempting to confirm my suspicions.

"Well, I see trying to pull it out of you is completely useless." He sighed and put his hands on his hip with a determined look on his face. "_Well, _what's the deal between you and Botan!"

"What?" _Why is he talking about this?_

"Wow! First time Kurama's clueless!" Yusuke laughed, enjoying my supposed "clueless" air. "Aw, come on! You like her don't you?" He raised one eyebrow and grinned at me.

"What? I don't know…" I began, but I knew exactly what he was talking about and I _did not_ want to discuss anything about it. Then a foreboding feeling concluded when I heard a familiar voice behind me.

"Of course he does, Urameshi! It's written all over his face!" It was none other than Kuwabara, just the right person I needed at a situation like this. He strode right to us with the same ridiculous grin on his face as Yusuke had before.

_Great, I get tagged teamed._

"Yup! I've been waitin' quite a while for Kurama to fall for some girl. Who knew it would be my assistant?" Yusuke laughed leaning on my shoulder. Kuwabara nodded fervently in agreement. I could suddenly feel the heat rise in my face and the last thing I needed was some evidence to be used against me. I quickly tried to regain my composure, hoping and willing the heat to subside. "I mean seriously, you guys looked really good in there. All dancing together and everything."

"I don't feel like that. She's just a really good friend. I'd dance with you too if you wanted."

"What?" yelled a shocked Kuwabara. He had always been the gullible one on the team and I can't help but use it to my advantage.

"Right, Kurama." Yusuke said sarcastically and too smugly for his own good.

"I knew that." A relieved Kuwabara insisted as he continued the assault. "So Kurama, is she a _really _good friend?" He nudged at my elbow and winked. His obnoxious grin became wider and wider.

"Yeah. Really, _really_ good?" They both began laughing hysterically and rather idiotically too seeing as how Kuwabara had doubled over and was banging the ground to find another way to vent his mirth. I suddenly felt _very _tired and the thought of being at home looked more and more welcoming. So as they were caught up in their amusement, I quickly and quietly backed away from them and went in the opposite direction until I was assured that there was a good and safe amount of distance between us. The warmth on my face was still lingering as I walked towards the direction of the portal leading to Ningenkai.

"They're probably right you know." A voice said. I jumped slightly and saw Hiei standing in the shadows. _What is the matter with me?_ I thought a little frustrated with myself._ How come I couldn't sense Hiei there? Was I this…distracted?_ I crossed my arms again.

"Now don't you start Hiei-" I began.

"Alright." He closed his eyes and smiled very slightly. "They will." He pointed his finger behind me. Sure enough, Yusuke and Kuwabara were coming towards us fast. A huge growing cloud of dust was behind them as they sprinted toward us.

"Hey, Kurama!" Kuwabara yelled.

"Yeah, wait a minute man! Guy talk!" Yusuke called. I gritted my teeth and looked for means of escape but realized the area was an enclosure of the Reikai palace and the slope of a mountain. Escape was futile. Hiei jumped up to a cliff right above us and settled down ignoring my glare. _Fine stay there and watch._

"You know, I don't blame you Kurama. I mean, I fell for her when I first met her." Kuwabara said as he came up. "But that was before I met my darling Yukina of course!" Up on the cliff, I could sense Hiei shift uncomfortably.

_That should teach him_._ There's an idea, Yukina. She'll be the perfect change of subject._ Pursuing the stroke of genius, I decided to prod the fire demon's sensitive issues. "Yes, Kuwabara. When _do_ you plan to take your relationship a little further?" I asked, knowing that Hiei was about to come bursting down in a rage of fire and brimstone.

"Well, you see-" He began but then Yusuke cut in.

"Now, now. Kurama, don't be modest! It's your time to shine!" Yusuke said innocently but completely knowing he had shifted the attention right back to me. _Since when had Yusuke become so clever at handling conversations with me?_ He then looked up at the cliff above us. "Tonight is all about you!" He grinned up at Hiei while I closed my eyes and took in a deep breath preparing for the torture….

Who knew the Reikai Tantei were such sadistic heroes.


	2. Remembering Her

Author's Note: Man, what was I ON five years ago?! More corny old school KB from the younger me of 2002. Gah.

Disclaimer: Yu Yu Hakusho is owned by Yoshihiro Togashi

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Remembering Her 

It _was_ a torture.

By the time they let me go, my face was no longer just warm. They had completely trapped me when we had our "guy talk" and were even able to make me look like a schoolboy in love. Even though I tried putting up a defense, the results were bad in my favor.

I was very embarrassed from the defeat as I made my way home. It was difficult to argue with them as I found that I was also arguing with…._myself._ During their teasing, I realized that I might have had feelings for Botan for a while now. Once again, I found myself arguing with two sides. But throughout my constant struggle, there was a voice or feeling that I might have found something…

_She has been with me through all of our troubles and she would understand my problems..._

By the time I reached my house it was very early in the morning. When I finally reached my room (the haven at that point), I slumped down on my bed and found that something was lodged against my back. I tiredly pulled it from behind me and found it was yet _another_ gift from one of my admirers. Without even thinking, I tossed it to a seat where I kept all of my 'gifts'.

_They're all wasting their money. I couldn't care less for those things._

I almost fell asleep when I remembered the gift _she _gave me. I felt the heat return to my face. Groaning, I grabbed a pillow and covered my face with it in hopes of getting some rest but it was awhile before I sleep finally found meDespite everything though, I somehow felt that my other half was pleased.

Remembering that night, made me laugh quietly to myself. The wedding was a refreshing change in scene for our team that I would never forget. I settled back into the tree and closed my eyes. Though my teammates were teasing me, I was very fortunate to have such good friends.

Suddenly my watch alarm went off bringing me back to reality. I pulled up my sleeve and found that it was nearly five thirty. Work needed to be done at the office. My stepfather was counting on me to finish some paperwork. Once again my boundaries cut into my time and I was forced to go back to my typical day in the human world. I slowly and reluctantly began to pack up my things and headed off to work.

As I walked into the building, every person who knew my stepfather greeted me. I returned their greetings without actually caring and flashed an automatic smile at everyone I met. When I opened the door to my office, what should greet me but a mountain of paperwork along with a note telling me that I had a meeting with a certain Mr. Wada. The man was another worker in the building and he was a friend of my stepfather. I lazily walked over to his office and opened his door. He was a dumpy old man with a receding hairline. I didn't care much for the man since he's been known to dump a good amount of work on my stepfather, which would then go to me. I greeted him without much sincerity. As I entered the room, he got up and gave me a huge phony grin.

"Ah, Shuichi! Come in! Have I got a surprise for you!" he roared and pushed me into a chair. Or rather, I let him push me.

"Yes, Mr. Wada. Is there something you want to talk to me about?"

"Yes, I was thinking, how you were a handsome young man in the verge of adulthood."

I stared.

"Love is in the air and I was thinking how much you would like to go on a date with my daughter!" He declared, rather than asking. I was completely disgusted.

"No thank you, Mr. Wada I'm not interested." And with that, I stood up and made my way to the door.

"Wait, Shuichi! Are you sure? She'll really be worth your while! She told me she went to your school!" He followed me and put a hand on my shoulder. I suddenly had the urge to rip his hand off ….I turned around and narrowed my eyes.

"I'm sure."

His eyes widened and he immediately took his hand off my shoulder. "R-Right. Thank you for…. your time."

I nodded and went out of his office more annoyed than ever.

_My temper is really getting out of control today. _

When I walked down the hall two people thanked me for the work I had accomplished yesterday. The greetings were reciprocated and I found my way back to the office. The mundane busy work was still there and I felt more fatigued then before. _The work can wait until tomorrow. If anyone says otherwise they'll have to deal with me._ I gathered up my things for the fourth time that day and made my way home. My sour disposition continued as I walked down the street desperately wanting to get home. Being so caught up in my thoughts, I didn't notice someone call out my name.

"Kurama!" At first I was decided to ignore whoever it was but then I realized the person didn't call me 'Shuichi' so I looked back. Yusuke waved enthusiastically for me to come over. Seeing his grin, I relaxed. Finally I could talk to someone without letting my anger get the better of me.

"Hello," I greeted, glad to be in the company of a friend. "What are you doing?" Yusuke's face fell.

"'Hanging out' with Keiko. But I managed to escape for a second." He frowned at me. "The real question is what is wrong with you? When I saw you, there was this look on your face that I would usually wear. Scowling is not your thing Kurama."

"Nothing. Just a tough day."

"There you go again!" Yusuke said pointing at my face.

"Yusuke!" We both turned around and saw Keiko standing near an ice cream booth. She looked surprised as she noticed my presence and came over. "Hi Kurama! It's good to see you again. I'm glad you found a certain someone who conveniently left while I was buying some food," She glared over at Yusuke, who suddenly seemed very interested a particular store on the opposite side of the street.

"Aw, you know I saw Kurama and I wanted to come over and say hi." Yusuke explained, still careful to avoid eye contact.

"Well since you're here Kurama, why don't you come join us?" Keiko offered. Yusuke looked at me hopefully and hurriedly nodded his head in agreement.

"Thank you for the offer, but I must really be getting home." I declined and bade them goodbye, leaving Yusuke with his signature scowl on his face. Even though I was with them for just a moment, I felt relieved. No one can deny that they made a perfect match for each other. It was always a reassuring to see Yusuke with someone who could understand the way he lived his life.

A light wind began to blow and my senses were once again aroused. The calming signal of the day's end made the annoyances of the day insignificant if only for a second. Despite my unpleasant disposition, it had been a beautiful day. It was unfortunate that its effect weren't contagious enough to have had affected me earlier. But now it brought to my mind a get-together we had not too long ago….

"Hey guys, check out my sweet new wheels!" Yusuke called over to me, Kuwabara, Shizuru and Yukina. Yusuke had just gotten a new motorcycle and was flaunting it off every chance he got. To complete his image, he wore a black leather jacket complete with shades. As he hopped off and proceeded to greet everyone, Keiko managed to get over her paralyzed state and began to shakily remove her helmet. She was obviously shaken up after the suicidal trip with Yusuke.

"Ha! That's nothin' Urameshi. _My _new wheels beats the crap out of yours!" retorted Kuwabara as he pointed to his car, a new present he had just acquired. "Right Kurama?" Since he expected my support, I glanced over to his car and gave Kuwabara a smile. Truthfully, I'd have to admit that Yusuke's bike was very impressive. It stood gleaming in the sunlight and its new features were only accentuated with the blinding glare. The new redlined black coat flashed at onlookers and put much emphasis on the gold bird in the front. All in all, Kuwabara's car couldn't really compare but I wasn't about to be the one to tell him that. Yusuke raised one eyebrow and took a lazy look over at Kuwabara's car.

"That piece of junk?" scoffed Yusuke. "Oh right, how could my _new_ and totally _sweet_ ride compare with your hand-me-down car?" At that, I knew that there would be a fight or rather a race. It was rather predictable.

"That's it, Urameshi! Get your helmet on and prepare to eat my dust!" Shizuru, Yukina and I all simultaneously sighed at their good natured but all too competitive rivalry.

"Well, at least this will be interesting." Shizuru commented as Yusuke and Kuwabara prepared to race.

"Wish me luck Yukina!" Kuwabara called as he waved furiously at his beloved.

"It's not luck you need buddy, it's a new bike like mine!" Yusuke lauged as he revved up his engine. We were in the outskirts of town and there was a country road opened to the far side of the park where we were. So it was decided that the two would race to the end of the park.

"Yusuke, put your helmet on!" Keiko reminded. Yusuke grumbled but did as she asked.

"Hey Kurama! Can you be the judge?" Kuwabara asked from his car. I agreed as the spectators went to the end line. Throughout the walk, Kuwabara and Yusuke's threats mingled with insults, punctured the quiet atmosphere.

When we finally reached the finishing line, I could hear the engines roaring ferociously; I knew they were raring to go. I raised my hand and brought it down. And they were off. Both car and motorcycle were heading toward us pretty fast. From what I could see, both Yusuke and Kuwabara had a fierce look of determination on their faces. Kuwabara gritted his teeth while Yusuke had that signature, penetrating gleam in his eye. At the half point, it seemed that Kuwabara was ahead but Yusuke was catching up, he was never one to quit.

"Who do you think will win?" I suddenly asked casually addressing a familiar presence in the tree behind us.

"They are pathetically slow but she will." That's when my eye caught a figure in the sky. I squinted and saw it was Botan. She was speeding toward us and was slowly descending. The distance between us was rapidly closing as she sliced through the air on her oar. Remembering my job as the judge, I turned my attention back to the two other racers and saw that Yusuke was ahead and was about to win when Botan crossed the finish line and landed. She turned around to Yusuke and beamed. Yusuke looked completely horrified.

"Looks like I win Yusuke!" Botan laughed and pointed to her oar.

"That's not fair it doesn't count!" Yusuke growled. Kuwabara came up to us and laughed.

"Right Urameshi, your motorcycle can't even be beaten by an oar." He laughed and of course, the two of them began a row that was certain to last for at least ten minutes. It was always quite funny watching them fight each other with teasing blows that would have most certainly have killed any average person.

After they had settled down, we prepared to have a picnic. It was a very breezy day; the air was inviting and invigorating so I decided to take a walk later to allow my other half some much needed time alone. Hiei was still 'hiding' in that tree to keep an eye on sister. The thought made me smile as I realized everyone had reunited again after so long I had begun to prepare for the picnic when Keiko and Shizuru stopped me.

"You don't need to do that Kurama. Let those two do it." Keiko pointed to a disgruntled Yusuke and a smug Kuwabara.

"No it's all right. I don't mind." I insisted but Shizuru had already marched over there to inform them of their work.

"Yes, Kurama. I think they need something to occupy them so they won't continue their argument." Yukina said just as Yusuke awarded Kuwabara for his arrogant attitude.

"That's right." Botan smiled and nudged me away. Outnumbered, I nodded and began to take a walk when I felt her hand on my shoulder. As I turned around, she hastily pushed something into my arms. "Kurama, if you don't come back before we start, you can eat this if you're hungry."

"Thank you Botan." I said and took the bag but not before I noticed some bandages wrapped around several of her fingers. Before I could inquire about her injuries, she turned away apparently not wanting me to notice the tinge of red on her cheeks. I smiled and continued on my way down the path.

From time to time, I knew the spirit fox inside me needed his moments of solitude as well. The air felt cool and it revitalized my senses. When I headed back, I saw everyone was beginning to have a good time. Before I had a chance to settle down however, I heard a beeping sound. Botan quickly took out her communicator and seemed to quickly apologize to everyone. I was still far away so I couldn't hear what she said but I knew what that meant. She was once again being called to Reikai. She mounted her oar and flew my way.

"What's the matter Botan?" I asked as she neared me.

"Oh, you're back, Kurama."

"Yeah. You're leaving already?" I asked and felt the disappointment in me grow as she quickly produced her oar.

"I am sorry but I have to go. Koenma needs me," She nodded unhappily. "This always, _always_ happens!"

"You can't stay for a little while longer?" I said even though I knew she couldn't. "We just started. You haven't even had anything to eat yet."

"I know but this is urgent. Well, with Koenma, I guess you could say every errand is urgent." She smiled. "Besides, I'm not that hungry." But just as those words left her mouth her stomach betrayed her. Botan's cheeks turned a little pink and she laughed. "Well, you know being in this form…." I smiled back then noticed the bag she had given me earlier.

"Here," I said and gave the bag to her. "I think you need this more than me." She held the bag and looked away from me. I suddenly saw the familiar pink tinge in her cheeks deepen. She then opened the bag and took out two rice cakes. She then stuck her nose in the air and shoved one back to me.

She grinned and said, "Well Kurama, I want you to have one. After all, I gave it to you first."

"Botan, I'm going to the picnic. I don't need it." I insisted but she had a little pout on her face. I laughed. She looked adorable with that look-_ wait, adorable?_. When I looked back at her, the expression had changed into the unmistakable puppy dog one. I sighed. There was absolutely no way I could refuse when she looked like that. "All right Botan, let's compromise. I'll eat mine right now if you eat yours."

"All right Kurama." At that we both ate our cakes.

"Happy?" asked Botan.

"Quite." I said a little teasingly, though of course, I was being entirely honest.

"Well, thanks Kurama, but I have to go. See you later!" With that she waved and sped off. As I watched her go, I felt a little lonely, which surprised me. I found that I really wished she could have stayed. It wouldn't be the same without her. When I walked back, I found that they discovered Hiei there and thus, the teasing began. I sensed that Hiei was about to explode in a huge rage of fury when Yusuke pushed him next to Yukina. Then he stiffened up and sat perfectly still.

I approached them and acted completely surprised and delighted that Hiei was there, which he rewarded me with a frightening glare.

"It's a shame Botan couldn't stay." Yukina commented as she passed around the bento boxes Keiko had made. "I feel so sorry for her."

"Yeah, and Botan actually helped me with this picnic." Keiko said. _Botan helped make the food?_ Keiko handed me a rice cake. "Here, these rice cakes are really something. She slaved away for hours making these!"

I never forgot that day either. I felt at ease, remembering back to our last team get together….Remembering Botan…I jerked out of my thoughts and realized that I was almost home. That was something new. I was so caught up in my thoughts that I didn't know where I was going. Why was I growing so restless lately?

My house came into view as I turned around the corner. It was the old house I lived in since I was born as a human. It gave me comfort, seeing it. Though my youko side love being in the wild, the house wasn't bad.

I went in and found it empty. For right now, that was exactly what I wanted. I walked into my room and laid down on my bed. The sun was already beginning to set and the orange glow fell into my room._ What an awful day. _I thought. _I swear if it wasn't for my memories…_

That's when it hit me.

I was moody. Moody. Whether I was Shuichi Minamino or Youko Kurama, I was _never _moody. Or restless for that matter. Looking back, I saw that I was irritable, angry and seemed to be fixated on the past. I groaned and grabbed a pillow and buried my face in it.

_Please don't tell me I'm going through that teenage angst stage. I am way too old and mature for that. I mean I **am** hundreds of years older than humans._

The past…although I didn't want to admit it, my memories all focused on one person.

_Botan..._

Pushing the thought aside, I decided to retire early. I got ready for bed and slipped into an uneasy sleep.


	3. Until We Meet Again

Author's Note: Reading this story over pretty much made me cringe. I rewrote some parts slightly just to keep some of my dignity…and sanity. Whatever. It's done, caput, finito so I've kept my word. Yah.

Thanks for reading!

Disclaimer: Yu Yu Hakusho is owned by Yoshihiro Togashi

* * *

Until We Meet Again 

My heart was thumping hard. Pain. Sweat. I was cold. I was being pulled in two directions. It was agonizing and unbearably difficult to move.

_It's all right._

I felt a voice reassuring me. Reassuring me of what? The pounding of my heart increased and I couldn't concentrate on what was going on…I couldn't take it anymore. I sank to the ground on my knees putting one hand on my chest trying to steady my heart. The voice grew louder.

_Don't fool yourself. You're only in denial. Accept it!_

Accept what? My heart was continually beating. Faster. Faster. The pain was excruciating; I couldn't even make out where I was or how much time had passed. I could feel beads of cold sweat roll down from my temple. I closed my eyes tight and clenched my teeth hoping that it could help me bear the pain better. The darkness was enveloping me. Even though it was only in my eyes, the shadows felt like they were swallowing everything and drowning my body.

I yelled out in pain. My whole body was trembling from the my raging pain in my chest. Unable to keep myself upright, I felt my body slump over unable to bear it any longer. I felt weak as I have never felt before. My mind was about to shut down when I noticed a warm glow. A light. Even though my eyes were closed I knew there was a light coming from somewhere…I forced my eyes opened.

The pain was slowly receding. My breathing was still rapid but otherwise, I felt like I could get up. My heart was no longer in a sporadic state. Well, more normally than before. I got on my knees and my gaze followed the warm glow until I saw a figure.

It stood there in the darkness beside me. The warm glow was coming from this person. Even though I couldn't make out the face, I knew that it was smiling. Suddenly, it held out a hand to me.The glow became brighter as I reached for the outstretched hand hand. I was almost there. When our hands touched, the figure spoke.

"Kurama."

It was Botan.

I jerked awake. It was eleven forty three. I found that my covers were thrown down on the floor. _Some dream. What was that all about? The pain, that reassuring voice, Botan…her hand? _

Suddenly I heard a loud thud outside. I tensed and went to my window only to find Botan floating outside. This was probably the strangest coincidence I had ever experienced but I quickly put that thought aside and opened the window.

"Botan? What are you doing here?" I asked but she didn't answer me. All she said was that I was a heavy sleeper. It was difficult for her to come into my room on her oar so I took her hand and began to lead her in. Beneath my window was a step where I kept all of my "gifts". I was about to move them for her when she told me that I shouldn't and stood up to climb in herself. Although she insisted that she was fine, her foot slipped on the sill and she lost her footing. Fortunately, I was able to catch her in time.

"Are you all right Botan?" I asked as I helped her stand back up. She looked a little preoccupied as she shook her head. I was afraid she had hurt herself badly but she assured me she was fine.

She quickly stood up and brushed herself off. I said it was all right while she apologized and rubbed her head. I was still concerned but I made my way to my desk and sat down. She followed suit and rested on the edge of my bed but still didn't say anything, which worried me.

"So what's the matter Botan?" I asked. She seemed really distracted and didn't answer me right away but when she did, I wished she hadn't.

"Koenma has decided to seal off the three worlds. Permanently." She looked at me with sadness in her lavender eyes. _What? Seal the three worlds? Then that means…_

"Do you know why, Botan?" I asked not really paying attention to the reason. All I could think about was that our worlds would be separated. Until death… But I did hear her when she said it would be completed at midnight. Midnight. Tonight.

"Tonight?" I asked hardly being able to believe it. " So that means…" I couldn't say it but Botan finished my sentence for me.

"I'll never be able to see you again."

I looked up at her. Her eyes were brimming with tears that threatened to fall any second despite her attempt to be strong. As I sat there helpless, I wished that I could do something for her. Watching her struggle with the news was more than I could bear and I utterly hated the fact that I couldn't do anything to comfort her.

And it was at that exact moment, that I knew I loved her.

I finally understood my dream. I had been fighting against my own feelings. I _was_ in denial. The fact that she was always there was unreal. I was afraid that she couldn't understand me and I was unsure of my own feelings. The thought of me loving her felt so good but I wasn't sure if I could love because I was a demon.

It scared me to think that if I had told her and loved her for the wrong reasons, she wouldn't have accepted me. She could have even come to hate me because I'd used a pathetic excuse to use her and base our friendship on lies.

A recurring thought had plagued me throughout the years as well. I wanted to deny my human life so I could live the way Youko Kurama wanted to. I wanted to live the life of a demon once more but now I knew that I am to live my own life. I am separate from Youko Kurama. And…he knows that.

_It's all right…accept it!_

Youko, it was Youko who said...

I felt his reassurance, his encouragement and reason. This was _the_ time, _my_ time, the last _chance_ I had in order to tell her. No more thoughts of protecting her from my own unstable feelings. No more hiding behind Youko. No more denial. I had to tell her that I loved her now.

I braced myself and began, "Botan, I-" But Botan suddenly interrupted me.

"I wanted to thank you for that rose you gave me…It matched the color of my eyes perfectly…"

"…"

It took me awhile to even realize what she was talking about. Then I remembered the rose I gave to her at the wedding, which seemed like ages ago.

"Well, I didn't think you'd notice," I said smiling. But Botan seemed to be in her own world; she hardly heard anything I said. She began to squirm uncomfortably and her hands were fidgeting with her kimono.

"Kurama, I have to tell you something…um…" I gazed at her. Whatever she had to tell me seemed to be putting her in turmoil. She bit her lip and kept her eyes to the floor. "Kurama…I..." It wasn't like Botan to stutter nervously.

Suddenly she shut her eyes tight. "I-I…I love you!"

I felt my heart skip a beat as I froze.

She had said that she loved me. Botan loved me. Those three simple words lifted a weight off of my shoulders and I felt as though a part of me had been saved. Even though a lingering sadness sat in the back of my mind reminding me that our time was about to be over, her words never made me surer of anything in my life.

Botan had always been with me. Even at the beginning. She was always there as a part of our group. And over the years, unbeknownst to me and her, she became a part of my heart. Through all of our missions, she had been there by my side. My uncertainty had clouded my obvious thoughts and feelings. But now I finally knew.

It wasn't until I saw Botan that I realized that she still didn't know how I felt. I silently cursed myself for being so slow and walked over to her. She sat there with her eyes still shut and her hands clenched tight. Her whole body was slightly quivering. I took her hands in mine and pulled her next to me.

When I was in front of her, she opened her eyes and tears began to fall down her cheeks. _Why is she crying?_ She made a movement to wipe her cheek but I got there before her. I softly wiped away her tears with my finger. I felt her cheek was warm and its color deepen as I touched it.

But suddenly I felt her pulling away from me. The tears still fell from her cheeks as she drew away. I stopped her with one hand on her shoulder. With the other hand I tilted her chin up for her to face me.

"I love you too, Botan." She froze and looked up at me. Her eyes held a look of utter surprise.

"What?" she asked. I didn't know exactly how she felt when I said that but at that moment I didn't think of anything else. I leaned in and kissed her. I wanted her to know, to feel how much I cared and even though I knew our love would eventually put us into separate worlds full of pain and sadness, I kissed her with everything I had.

When we separated, Botan had the radiant smile on her face again, yet she was still crying. She hopelessly tried to dry her tears and looked at me.

"It's funny you know, I finally found you and we have to be apart." Her words came out in a choked sob that confirmed what I already know is in store for us. I felt an enormous weight in my heart yet I knew I had to be strong for her, for us. I pulled her into my arms allowing her to break down completely and cry into my shoulder. I leaned my head against hers.

"Botan, it's okay. Calm down. You don't want to spend our last minutes together crying now do you?"

"No…" Botan pulled back to look at me. Her eyes were a little red and swollen. It was obvious she'd been crying for hours before she came to see me. But before she had to go, I wanted her to smile again like all of those times before when we shared moments full of laughter together.

"Botan, I love you. I have been for a long time and now that I know you love me, it makes my life complete. Though we can't be together, I'll always keep you in my heart." I had expected her to smile a little but instead she looked alarmed.

"Now wait, Kurama. I don't want to keep you from finding love with someone else. I don't want you to wait for me-" she began. Inside I felt, I knew that she was the only girl for me. There would never be another and I wanted her to know that. I placed both of my hands on her shoulders and looked directly in her eyes.

"Botan, there will be no other for me." She looked back at me and she finally had that smile back on her face.

"Kurama, I'll always watch over you and I'll be with you wherever I go." I finally had a breakthrough. She was feeling better and that lightened my heart a little.

"Well now, it seems I have acquired a Guardian Angel." I meant every word I said. Being in Reikai and escorting souls has earned her the title as the Grim Reaper, but I could only see her as the opposite: my personal angel. As long as I kept her in my heart, her memory would help me cope with the fact that we can't be together.

After taking a deep breath, I gave her an enormous smile that I have never given anyone else making her laugh like she once did. As I watched her laugh Botan suddenly let out a gasp and her body suddenly shimmered in and out of focus. A wave of fear washed over me as she held onto my arms. I took her hands in mine and held them tightly and thinking that if I held on long enough, tightly enough, she would not disappear.

To confirm my dreaded though, I spun around and looked at my clock. It read eleven fifty-nine. This was our last minute; our last sixty seconds together. I couldn't help feeling that I had taken my time with her for granted.

"This is it, Kurama. Please tell the others goodbye for me." I could tell she was determined to be strong but her voice faded near the end…I knew it must be heart wrenching for her to leave the others...

"Of course." I found that I could only whisper. I knew that she was leaving me , we were parting and for the first time in so long, I felt tears. My vision blurred. I squeezed her hands tighter. She began to cry again, yet, she still held a look of hope in her eyes.

"Remember Kurama, I'll always be with you. You gave me the love that I have always hoped for." Her voice sounded distant already. "You have been and will always be the only one for me Kurama. I love you so much." Those words echoed in my mindand would continue to do so for a very long time to come. My heart began to beat faster, exactly like in my dream. The time we had were slipping away and I could never get it back….She was slipping away from me.

"Botan…" I whispered. Tears were running freely down her cheeks once again as she raised one hand to touch my face. Then she leaned up and kissed me.

I decided that as a parting gift, I would give her my final rose so I swiftly took out my signature flower and softly placed it in her left hand. At first, my mind could not accept the fact that she was leaving but as she kissed me I found that I was lost in my feelings for her. But suddenly, just I was lost in my thoughts I was jerked back to the present, as I no longer felt her lips nor her small hands in mine. I opened my eyes as she slowly grew fainter and finally disappeared from me.

But even though my eyes could not see her, my heart told me that she was there. That was something that my instincts as a human or demon could never do.

I spun around. "You'll be in my heart, Botan."

After standing at the same spot for a long time, I finally convinced myself that she was gone. Carried away back to Reikai, back to another world. I walked over to the window she had entered. The night air blew across my face and reminded me of our memories together.

Spending more than one thousand years as a demon fox raiding treasures and earning a name for myself as the best thief that had ever existed was my beginning. It was a life that I was forced to leave because death had very nearly caught up with the illusive life I held. Coming into Ningenkai and growing up as a human with a mother and a father was the next phase of my life. I thought it temporary and unimportant as I waited patiently for the time to revert back to my old ways. Little did I know that this life was to lead me to my friends, to paths that coincided with my past and in the end, to her. She was my last chapter; because of her, I have set out the rest of my life and I will follow through with my words to her.

Accepting that she was gone was the hardest thing I ever had to do, but knowing that she was with me in spirit and love helped me move on. I knew that as long as I carried her in my heart, she would never truly be gone.

Until we meet again.


End file.
